Karaoke
by viva rose
Summary: Reno/Rude pairing, the two Turks go out for some drinks and end up singing. My first attempt in this fandom, please bear with me.


Vivarose: Well I admit it, I am officially now a fangirl of Final Fantasy VII

Vivarose: Well I admit it, I am officially now a fangirl of Final Fantasy VII. I never expected it, but after watching Advent Children the second time around I realized it. So now plot bunnies are assaulting my brain. Enjoy.

Disclaimer: I don't own FFVII, nor do I own the song "Lapdance" that is the property of N.E.R.D. who is possibly the most racially diverse group I've seen to date thus far, and I strongly encourage ya'll to look them up. The fic was inspired by this awesome picture on Deviant Art by Ninja Chic: ninja-chic./art/Comic-Wannabe-41682879

Plot summary: Reno and Rude go out for Friday night drinks and end up karaoking. Slight Reno/Rude, and a drunk Reno.

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It was a fairly typical Friday night at the 7th Heaven. A good sized crowd, nothing like when the annual Chocobo Races were on, but still a good sized one. Tifa Lockhart grinned as she worked behind the bar, she'd done some renovations to the place adding pool tables, dart boards and her latest item: a karaoke machine. The small additions were bringing more people to hang out at the bar, which meant that sooner or later they would have to spend money, usually on drinks and after that point her customers easily parted with their money. She stayed open till one or two in the morning on the weekends and it was roughly midnight right now, the people would soon begin to dissipate and she could clean up and go to sleep, tomorrow she would have to make a run to the bank the woman thought as she eyed the tip jar that was nearly three quarters full.

The door opened and she straightened from her leaning position on the back of the bar, ready to greet the customer but the words never left her mouth as she registered who it was. Turks. The oddly paired redhead and bald men, Reno and Rude respectively. Instinctively she moved a hand beneath the counter, ready to pull out her gun if trouble started. Tifa had learned quickly that having a gun was useful if she was going to be serious about having a bar, yes her martial art skills were significantly stronger than that of most women, but against sometimes as many as fifty drunks, fire power was a little more convincing.

"Evening Tifa," Reno smirked, sliding into a seat right in front of the woman, his typical smirk on his face. "And you can relax, yo. We're off duty." Tifa watched them both warily, as Rude in his customary silence sat next to Reno. "You gonna serve us yo?"

Tifa glowered at him slightly but retrieved a pad and pen to start a tab for the two,

"What will it be then, _gentlemen_," she said icily. Reno smirked and pulled a wad of bills from his jacket pocket.

"Just keep 'em coming yo."

QQQQQQ

"Fuckin' A Tifa," Reno slurred. The redhead apparently liked his liquor in the same manner he liked his women: hard and fast. Perhaps too fast. "You really spiffed the place up yo." The bartender looked at Reno in slight concern and then at his partner, stoic as ever.

"Is he seriously already drunk?" she as out of the corner of her mouth to the dark skinned Turk.

"Nope just boozey," he answered as he watched Reno from behind his sunglasses. The equation was a familiar one to him by now: Reno plus alcohol equals impending disaster. And the thought passed through the taller man's mind not a moment too soon as he found himself being pulled away from his drink and over to a small stage to the left of the bar.

"Reno, what are you doing?" Rude asked, already half knowing the answer as he eyed the equipment.

"I found our song yo!" his partner exclaimed excitedly as he haphazardly placed a cd in the player and mashed some buttons on the karaoke machine.

"Reno, we don't have a song." The redhead stopped his mashing of the buttons and grinned lopsidedly at his partner before handing him a mic and dragging him onto the small stage as the intro music played and Reno began singing,

Dirty Dog  
I'm, I'm a dirty dog  
I'm a dirty dog  
I'm, I'm a dirty dog  
Dirty Dog  
I'm a dirty dog  
Dirty Dog

At that point Rude remembered the song that had played on the radio on their first day they had been teamed up and somewhat begrudgingly took his cue for the first set of lyrics as Reno echoed him:

I'm an outlaw (I'm an outlaw)  
Quick on the draw (Quick on the draw)  
Somethin' you've never seen before (Never Seen)  
And I dare a mother fucker to come in my face

_  
I got somethin' chrome (I got somethin' Chrome) _Reno pulled out his EMR and flipped it in one hand in a series of difficult maneuvers and Rude kept singing._  
And I got it from home (I got it from home)  
And it ain't a microphone (Ain't it a mic!)  
And I dare a mother fucker to come in my face  
It's so real  
It's How I Feel  
It's this society  
That makes a ngga wanna kill  
I'm just straight ill  
Ridin' my motorcycle down the streets  
While politicians is soundin' like strippers to me  
They keep sayin' but I don't wanna hear it..._

Reno retracted his weapon as the chorus came and wiggling his hips, brushed up on Rude in an obnoxious manner as the redhead sang the chorus:

Oooh baby you want me?  
Oooh baby you want me?  
Oooh baby you want me?  
Well you can get this lap dance here for free  
Now you can get this lap dance here for free  
Well you can get this lap dance here for free  
Oooh baby you want me?  
Now you can get this lap dance here for free

_  
_Rude pushed his partner out of in front of him and took the center of the stage again, the rhythm of the music getting to him a bit and he began to get into the funk, Reno eccentrically moving about as he backed his partner up:

It's a raw night (It's a raw night)  
Who wants to bar fight? (Who wants to bar fight?) Reno and Rude face each other.  
Well come on alright (Well come on) Rude  
And I dare a mother fucker to come in my face  
Baseball bats (Baseball bats) Reno pulled his weapon out again, brandishing it theatrically.  
I got somethin' for that (I got somethin' for that) And Rude pulled out his gun, flipping it in his hand and aiming it at the other Turk.  
It goes bla ka ka kat (You know what that is) They moved as if to attack each other and their weapons locked.  
So I dare a motherfucker to come in my face. They retracted their weapons and Rude kept singing,  
It's so real  
It's how I feel  
It's this society  
That makes a ngga wanna kill  
I'm just straight ill  
Ridin' my motorcycle down the streets  
While the government is soundin' like strippers to me  
They keep sayin' but I don't wanna hear it

Reno moved again to grind up against his partner as he sang, but Rude pushed him away and the redhead took center stage, winking at Tifa as he thrust his hips into the air and sauntered off the stage over to the bartender, still singing the chorus and jumped up on the bar, continuing to dance and sing the chorus, earning him several whistles from the occupants of the bar. The last set of lyrics started and Reno jumped off the bar and made his way back to the stage singing the last of the lyrics,

When you think of Harvey, think of a Harley  
Blue denim, spiked wrists and crombie  
Lap-screws and tattoos that's all me Reno wagged his tongue at Rude, winking, before nodding his head in a "wassup?" motion.  
Two guns, both arm's feelin' like Fonzie  
You can find me drunk, whip it it might crash  
Or find me chillin with crackers, who like Clash  
Find me in court smokin' that nice grass Reno lit a cigarette as he sang and put it in his mouth.  
Burnin' the flag, all in the name of white trash  
It's Harvey baby, Christ on the arm I'm gnarly baby  
Fuck with me? Not hardly baby  
And you know the flow, im Godly baby  
So lets party baby  
Chicks nick-name me pilot, they get high off my dick  
I take 'em to my home, they call it the cock pit  
Time for take off, their panties they drop quick  
Now that's first class fuckin, and that' some fly shit

The last chorus started, but Rude was singing, neither was Reno, as the two were currently tongue tied and Rude was pulling Reno off the stage. The two Turks staggered for a moment and Rude pulled away from Reno, who made a protesting noise, and put a bill in the tip jar for Tifa and then the two staggered out of the bar.

QQQQ

Vivarose: I hope ya liked! It is my first dabble in the FF7 universe so please have mercy


End file.
